Finding Myself
by DDF1428
Summary: This is going to be a long story with many chapters. It's how Clary finds herself after the death of her mother. This will be a Clary and Jace story that will eventually turn into rated M. All with due time.


(Hey everyone. This is my first fanfiction. I plan on making this a long story, so If you like it please follow it so you know when there's updates. If you don't like I understand. With that being said I hope you all enjoy this story.)

*ring* ring* ring*

I roll over in bed to answer my phone. I look at time and see it's 6 in the morning. I slide my finger to answer the phone.

"Hello" I stated in a voice barely above a whisper.

"Clary. It's Mia. Can you in as soon as possible to work? Tessa called in and I need help in the bakery.

Mia's voice sounds shaky and desperate. I reply "Yes. I'll be there soon."

I get out of bed and change into my work clothes and walk to work. Things in my life have gone to crap over the last few months. My father died when I was a baby and my mother passed away a few months ago. I planned on going to art school and becoming a famous artist, but when my mom died I quickly realized how expensive things are and I had to start working. I had to find my own apartment, which is a shit hole might I add. It's a simple studio apartment in the worse neighbor. It's constantly being raided by the police for drugs and prostitution. I can barely afford the rent there, but I'm getting by.

I work 40 hours a week at the bakery and then head off to work at a bar an additional 20 hours a week just to pay bills. I'm trying to save money to buy a car, but it seems like every time I try to save money something happens, or I need to buy new work clothes because my clothes got ruined. So, here I am a broke 18-year-old living in Boston with no money and trying to figure out what to do with my life.

I feel my pocket buzzing. I look at the screen and see it's Simon. Simon is my best friend from Kindergarten. He went off to college after we graduated high school and I haven't seen him since he left. He's coming home in a week for Christmas break and I can't wait to see him.

"Simon. How are you? I haven't talked to you in weeks." I say answering the phone.

"Hey Clary. I'm coming home early. I will be back home tonight. I want to you to meet my new girlfriend." He's some more excited then I want to hear this early in the morning.

I reply kind of annoyed. "Do you know what time it is Simon? I could have been sleeping."

"Come on Clary we both know you hardly sleep and are usually working." He states.

"You're right. Sorry I'm just tired." I state.

"It's alright Clary…..So tonight I'm having a dinner at my moms house. I want you to come and meet Izzy. It'll be fun." Simon states happily.

"I don't know Simon. I'm tired and I was suppose to be off today, but I got called into the bakery today." I say while yawning. I don't feel like meeting Simon's girlfriend. I want to see Simon but just me and him.

"Please Clary it means a lot to me that you meet Izzy." Simon begs me.

"Fine . I'll come." I state.

"Great. See you tonight. I can't wait to see you Fray." Simon reply.

I walk up to bakery "I can't wait to see you either. I will see you tonight. I have to go. I just got to work. Text me what time and I'll see you tonight." I say rushing.

I don't even wait for Simon to say bye because I see how long the line Is inside and Mia is all by herself. I quickly go in back and put on my apron and wash my hands to go to the front and help Mia with all of the customers. The morning goes by quickly and the chaos of the morning has calmed down. Mia tells me to take my lunch break, so I go to the back and sit down at the break table. I put my head on the table to sleep through my 30-minute lunch break. I sleep on my breaks all the time because I hardly sleep with my work schedules. I don't eat lunch because I don't have money to buy anything and since I had no notice that I was working today I didn't have time to make something to bring this morning.

Before I know it my break is over, but I have a little burst of energy to help me finish my shift. The rest of the day goes by smoothly and leave work at four o'clock. I walk out of the bakery and see Simon standing outside.

"How did you know I was here?" I state excitedly as I run up to him and give him a hug.

"You told me this morning when I was talking to you on the phone." He chuckles.

I reply "That's right. Sorry."

"Don't worry about it. I'm here to pick you up and take you to my mom's house." He states.

"Simon. I just got off work. I'm covered in flour and I smell like vanilla cupcakes." I reply.

Simon smells my hair "You do smell good." I push his arm and we both laugh. "IF you want to we can stop by your place so you can change and then we will go to my mom's house?"

"No. It's fine. Let's just go to your mom's house." I don't want Simon to see where I live. He knows I don't have money, but he doesn't know how terrible things are. I didn't want him to worry while he was at school at NYU. Now that he's back for winter break I should fill him in on my life.

Simon looks at me weird. "Okay then let's go." We get into Simon's new BMW and head towards his mom's house. "Wow Simon this a nice car." I say. "Thanks. I got it as an early Christmas present from my mom." Simon states.

It doesn't surprise me that Simon has a new car. His family is Jewish and has a ton on money. He's always had the newest and latest gadgets in my opinion, so a brand-new car shouldn't surprise me. We drive the short distant to his mom's house making small talk on the way there. He tells me about his semester and how he hates living in the dorms. He wants to get his own apartment off campus next year, but for now he's stuck at the dorms.

We arrive at his parents' house and Simon looks at me "Ready to meet Izzy?"

"As ready as I'll ever be." I state.

We get out the car and walk into his mom's house and standing in the living room talking to his mom is Izzy. She's beautiful. She has long black hair that is nice waves down her back. Her make-up looks perfect and she's wearing a short white mini dress with white heels. I look at Simon and he shrugs in shoulders. Izzy looks in our direction and screams "Simon! I missed you." She runs over to him and gives him a hug and kiss. Simon replies. "I missed you too." He looks over at me and says "Izzy I would like you to meet Clary. Clary think is Izzy my girlfriend."

"Hi. Nice to meet you." I put my hand out for her to shake, but she pulls me in for hug and says "Oh my god. You smell like vanilla cupcakes." Simon and I both laugh. Simon says "Clary works at a bakery."

"That explains why you smell so good. I love your red hair. I've never seen red hair so fiery. Is it natural, or do you dye it?" Izzy asks.

"It's all natural. Curls and all." I state.

Izzy smiles "I love it."

Simon's mom walks over to us and gives me a hug. We talk for a briefly before she tells me dinner is ready. We all go over to the table and eat dinner. During dinner, they talk about how Izzy and Simon meet, but I'm tuning them out because I start to drift off to how I wish I could sit and have dinner with my mom like Simon is with his mom.

I don't know how long I'm sitting there before Simon's voice breaks my thoughts. "Fray do you want to go out with us tomorrow night? Are you working?"

"Sure. Where are we going? I don't work tomorrow night." I state.

"I'll get back to you on that." He replies.

The rest of dinner goes by without a hitch. I finish my food and Simon takes me back to the bakery. I told him I left my car there, but I can't tell him I don't own one because he would insist on driving me home.

I walk home and I can't help but feel an overwhelming about of sadness because seeing Simon with his mom makes me miss my mom so much. She was my best friend and I could talk to her about everything. I miss her so much. For the first time in a long time I cry myself to sleep.

(Jace will be introduced in my next chapter. Hand tight guys he's coming ? )


End file.
